Ten years before my conception in my mother's womb a pope in Rome was defending the idea of conception as a good thing and contra-conception as an evil thing. He resisted the temptation to which many other religious communions and the world population as a whole had succumbed in the years prior. "Did God really tell you not to contracept?" was the serpent's question. While many insisted that certainly God did not tell us such a thing, it was this Pope who, in writing the famous document Humanae Vitae, insisted quite the contrary.
It would be 32 years after its publication that I would finally sit down and read what he wrote. It would be several more years of study before I was led to the understanding that what he wrote merely re-affirmed the vast history of religious sentiment on the idea of contra-conception: it was wrong. And it was, perhaps, the last time in modern history, and maybe in all of history, that the world gave attentive ear to the popes. What would Paul VI say about this? What greater confirmation of sexual liberation and what greater affirmation of our natural instincts than if the pope approved of contra-conception? Sex, after all, need not be connected to the age-old burdens of fidelity, family, and worse of all, children. The world was desperately waiting for its father to tell us it was OK to avoid children and make fidelity optional. But, his answer was no. And that was when the modern West through one last teenage rebellion entered adulthood with the firm sentiment that fathers were to be ignored and freedom meant doing whatever we wanted.
Of all the things that have come between men and women in the history of the world, contraception added more literal things to the list: latex, pills, and other such biologically-incorrect items. Can anyone really affirm that contra-conception as a whole has done anything to bring men and women closer together? How are divorce rates so high? How is infidelity so high? How is pornography so accessible and acceptable? How is abortion so frequent? How is homosexuality so commonplace? Are any of these things, so much more prevalent today as they were in 1969, signs that contra-conception has been a good thing for healing the wounds between men and women?
As it turns out, what men and women were liberated from when contraception became acceptable was not simply the constraints of conceiving children but the constraint of having to be true to their spouse. Sex may have meant love and fidelity and babies in the past, but now sex just means sex. How can one sever the link between sex and children? Contracept. How can one sever the link between sex and fidelity? Contracept. How can one sever the link between sex and meaningful love? Contracept.
A married couple that contracepts may beg to differ about their relationship. They can claim to have authentic love for each other while still contracepting. They can claim that their sexual acts, though contracepted, are in fact still expressions of their deep love for each other. But how deep does that love go? What they each know, and in particular what the woman must know, is that if they are willing to contracept, then it is clear that the spouse only intends sex and does not intend children. The question arises - a more difficult one to discover the answer to - does my spouse intend fidelity? The woman especially must see the reality: my spouse is willing to have intercourse with someone that he doesn't intend to have children with, because that is what he does with me. Is he also willing to forgo fidelity? Is he also willing to have sex with someone he is not married to? Given that contraception makes it much easier to escape being caught, does my spouse still intend fidelity?
This disrupts the whole foundation of trust that is supposed to form the bond of marriage. Children - and even the possibility of children - are like a divine seal against the infidelity of spouses. If there is no contraception, then the act of infidelity becomes much more difficult and much more undesirable. That contraception is available is temptation enough for the infidelity of spouses. But when contraception is introduced as an acceptable norm within a marriage from a moral standpoint, mistrust and infidelity are at the doorstep. Nay, they are already in the bedroom.
That the Catholic Church was able to take such a strong stand in defense of conception is reason for rejoicing. In addition, that the Church fell on the unpopular and misunderstood and ignored and hated side of the debate that ended the decade of the sexual revolution is not surprising. It is my hope though, that those who have been wounded and devastated by the effects of contraception be open to hearing a redeeming message. In Christ, all things are made new. There are such things as true love and faithful marriages. It is not an easy path - it never has been an easy path - and it takes extraordinary discipline. But for those who can obey their father - discipline in a marriage gives rise to freedom, peace, fidelity, and of course, the crowning joy, children.
For a well written analysis of Humanae Vitae and its predictions for human society if contra-conception was widely accepted within cultures, you can read a great article here:
http://www.firstthings.com/article.php3?id_article=6262
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